How we met

Although I wasn't laughing at the time, I now have to chuckle when I think about Ian and me flying into the U.S. (Chicago?) together last year. The flight was long and we were tired, yet we had to pick up our luggage and go through customs before continuing on to Kansas City.

As we took our luggage to the customs area, a security officer asked us if we were traveling together.
We said yes, we were.
He asked us how we knew each other.
Ian said, "He's my boyfriend."

I had to laugh. As they led us off to be searched, I reminded Ian that what he was supposed to say to U.S. officials was, "We met teaching law." That might have prevented the search.

It is true, of course, that we met teaching law. Well, kind of. We actually met a month or two before we taught law together in London.

Here's the scoop: A former law prof of mine (Nancy) had met Ian at a conference in Italy. She invited Ian back to the U.S. to work on putting a course together for Washburn's summer comparative law program in London. She asked me come to Topeka to help put together the text for the program - and she also wanted us to meet. She swears there was no ulterior motive, though, and I believe her.

So, I took time off work to go help Nancy.
Ian and I met and hit it off immediately. We didn't discuss the attraction we felt, though. It didn't feel right to talk about it, given that we were in a professional setting.

I made a couple of trips to Topeka to work while he was there, but I probably went more than I needed to because I enjoyed spending time with him. I made one trip specifically because he emailed me and asked me to help him pick out a thank you present for Nancy, since I knew her better than he did. He now tells me that was just an excuse to get me up there once more before he left.

Finally, he left for home,

but first he spent a week in New York.

While he was there, he sent me an email:

Hi Scott,

I REALLY enjoyed our time together. . . I would have come forward and told you beforehand but the thing is that I'm still quite British. Even though I have been Europeanised my inability to talk about my deepest feelings to non-family members or boyfriends is something still deep rooted in my character. Well, i think it's only fair, right and proper that I tell you that I really liked you on more than just one level.

As I said, I'm sorry that this all came through e-mail and I wish I had said this in Kansas, but I didn't want to spoil what had been a fantastic trip and didn't want to "sour" the moment. I hope you understand what I mean.

All my best wishes,

Ian

So, that's how it started.
We didn't actually have our first date until we were in London, teaching together at the Washburn Law School summer study program. From the time Ian sent the above email, though, we started conversing via email and phone calls. We knew each other pretty well by the time we finally saw each other again in London. On that thrip, we went to Liverpool and I was able to meet Ian's parents and his sister,
Pamela

We were even able to make a quick sidetrip to Blackpool, where a store tried to lure me in by letting me know...

I was perfectly content with mine, though, so I didn't think twice about stopping in to see what theirs were like.

After we met in London, we met on an almost monthly basis. Either Ian came to the U.S., I went to Europe, or we met somewhere else (Toronto or


San Francisco).

We usually spent at least 10 days together on these trips, although we spent about a month together over Christmas last year. During that trip, we did a Native American sweat in Wichita,


then went to Rochester N.Y. to introduce Ian to my brother, his wife and their daughter Cameron,


to Plattsburg, N.Y. to Natalie and Gary's wedding,



then to Colorado Springs


so Ian could meet my brother and sister.

By the end of that trip, we realised that not only did we want to live together, it would be easier and probably cheaper. It seemed like the times we were apart were spent counting down the days until we were together again.